Tag Archives: Love

2011 – A Year In Review

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I’ve been tossing around the idea of doing a “Year in Review” post for the last couple of weeks, and until recently, I had no idea of how I wanted to write it. Now that I know how to write it, it’s high time I get this thing out and in the open. It’s truly hard to believe that 2011 is winding down to a close. I feel like I was just surrounded by my friends, sipping champagne, and watching the ball drop. Now here I am, in the last week of the year, blessed to have gotten to this point, and amazed at how awesome of a year I had. The best way for me for me to remember my year, and to take you along for the ride with me is to give you the Top 10 (in no particular order) Moments of 2011. Here we go!

10. In April of this year, I decided that I no longer wanted to perm my hair…mostly because it was costing me too much money on a biweekly basis to keep it up. I went to the hair salon one day, asked my stylist to chop all of the perm out, and haven’t looked back since. Having a tiny fro (which then became a medium fro) was such an awesome thing – I gained some self confidence, got to play around with products, got some cool accessories, and really started coming into my own. A little less than a month ago, I decided to start the process of locking my hair, and I’m definitely excited to see where it is by the time I write a post like this in 2012!

9. I left the nest! In September of this year, I did what I had wanted to do since I graduated from college – move out of Mom Dukes’ house. Now, anybody that knows me knows that that wasn’t because we had a bad relationship or because she tried to dictate my life, because she didn’t, but it was time for me to spread my wings. I feel like my relationship with her is now stronger than ever, AND I have two of the best roommates a girl could ask for. Win-win!

8. This July, I took my first trip to Canada and descended on the city of Toronto for its annual Caribbean celebration, Caribana. I had the time. of. my. life. From the epic dinner I had with my friends upon getting into the city, to the parade, to the hype-as-hell Sunday night party, I had a ball up there. I’m sure I’m going back next year.

7. I’m a smaller version of myself than I was a year ago at this time. In December of 2010, I weighed 210 easy. Nowadays, I’m teetering around the 190 pound mark. I haven’t lost a pant size yet, and I need to get back into the gym/back into exercising and revamping my diet, but I’m making progress. 2011 showed me just how important it is to be fit, and to physically feel good about yourself, and that’s something I’m definitely taking into 2012.

6. I thought that 2010 was the year of meeting people from the internet. Nope, 2011 took the crown and took the crown early. From the now infamous Three Deez VSB Weekend in DC in April to the DMV Tweetup Cookout in June and all of the random encounters in between and beyond, I have met a lot of people from Twitter this year. Some of them have turned out to be really great friends, and I’ve shared some amazing experiences with a lot of the people I met this year. If you’re reading this and you were introduced into my life in 2011, I am so glad to have met you and I hope that 2012 tops how awesome this year was for all of the social happenings, and I hope we create even more memories next year.

5. I started this blog this year! I’d had a blog for a while, but I actually sat down and took the time to buy a dot com and start an adjoining Twitter account for my little corner of the internet in 2011. I haven’t posted like I wanted to, but I’m proud of myself for taking a chance on this, and so thankful to each of you reading this right now. You push me to continue honing my craft, and apparently, you care somewhat about what I have to say – that means the world to me.

4. 2011 was the year I got back to my roots, and rediscovered my dormant love and appreciation for photography. From taking photos to editing photos to looking at photos, I love everything about being behind the lens of a camera. 2012 is sure to bring a host of updates and progression in this area of my life, and if you want to follow my challenge to myself to take 1 picture a day for all of 2012, you can do so here.

3. Three words: The Foreign Exchange. If you’ve spent any time with me ever in life, you already know how I feel about them. So it’s only fitting that 2011 was the year that I first saw them in concert (3 times- Falls Church, VA, Baltimore, MD, and Charlotte, NC), and the year that I made it my mission to expose everyone I could to their music. If seeing them in concert and getting to meet them wasn’t awesome enough, they also have a picture I took from the Charlotte show as their Twitter avatar. *squeals* :-)

2. In the vein of music, 2011 was the year that I chose not to deny myself from seeing any and every concert I wanted to see. From Eric Roberson to Sade and John Legend; Jill Scott to The Foreign Exchange; Phonte and 9th Wonder to Rebirth Brass Band; to Jay Z/Kanye West and The Roots this coming Friday, I’ve exposed myself to a wide array of music, and have had experiences that I can’t put a price on. I have to keep that going next year…

1. I turned 25 back in October, and as cliché as it may sound, I really do feel like my life took a drastic change that day. It was that day I decided to cut out toxic people from my life, to focus on honing my God-given talents of writing and photography, to appreciate my family and friends more than I ever had before, to chase my dreams no matter how unrealistic they might currently seem, to open my mind to the idea of new ways of thinking, to take time to treat myself better than ever, and to simply have fun and chase my happiness down no matter what it took.

If you’ve made it this far, you’ll see that 2011 was a year of great change, great triumph, amazing discoveries, and life-changing experiences. Yes, there were negative experiences throughout the year, but they don’t really have a place in this post. The last year has taught me many valuable lessons about myself, and I am grateful for every experience I’ve had, whether it was viewed as positive or negative at the time. I hope that 2012 is an even better year for me, and equally as amazing for you, my readers. I appreciate you all, and Happy New Year!

25 for 25…

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Just under 24 hours from now, the clock will strike midnight, and it will be October 1, 2011. Which means, I’ll be 25! It honestly feels like I just turned 21, but…that’s neither here nor there, now is it? Needless to say, I’m more excited about this birthday than I have been for any other birthday in recent memory. Could that be because I have friends coming from California, Chicago, Toronto, Pittsburgh, Hampton, North Carolina, Ohio, and from around the Washington, DC metropolitan area to help me celebrate? Possibly. Could it be because I can finally rent a car without paying that stupid underage fee? Maybe. I think a lot more of it has to do with the fact that I actually feel a shift happening as I approach this birthday. It’s been an interesting journey through the first half of my 20s, and I’m actually eager to see what the last half brings. I’ve learned a hell of a lot about myself, about people, and about life over the last 5 years. What better way to look forward to the next 5 years than to share 25 things I’ve learned before I hit 25…these are in no particular order, but they’re all important to me, so bear with me. Maybe you’ll see something you can relate to in this list…

25. Good food and good music always go hand in hand with each other.

24. Having shoulders to cry on is just as important as having shoulders to stand on.

23. Emotions are powerful tools when controlled and expressed constructively.

22. True beauty radiates from within.

21. Not everyone deserves more than one chance to get it right with you.

20. Heartbreak is but a stepping stone in the journey to happiness – better to experience it now than to deal with it forever.

19. Having good counsel around you proves to be more important the older that you get.

18. The music you listen to is indicative of the way you view life.

17. Laughter is one of the best experiences one can partake in.

16. A cute, short black dress really does make you feel sexy.

15. Perspective is limited by one’s life experiences, morals, and intentions.

14. The company of strong women is more edifying than is given credit for in the mainstream.

13. Your network really is your net worth.

12. Talking about ideas doesn’t really do much – the implementation of ideas is where the true success lies.

11. Dreams really do come true.

10. No matter how small the biological family is, it should never be taken for granted.

9. Physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual health are all connected, and should all be taken care of with the same diligence and urgency.

8. The smallest moments with people you love will turn out to be the moments you remember the clearest.

7. Refusing to let your circumstances consume you may be the key to keeping a smile on your face.

6. Taking the time to let the people that you love know that you love them may benefit you more than it does them.

5. When people choose to walk out of your life, the best thing to do may be to actually let them walk. Fighting will only prolong the inevitable.

4. Aim to never be the smartest person in your circle.

3. Taking risks may blow up in your face, but it’s better to know than to walk around with the cloud of “what if” over your head.

2. Even when it doesn’t seem like it, your mother really does always have your best interest at heart and truly loves you more than she may know how to express.

1. God really does have it all under control.

I thank God that He is allowing me to get to 25…I hope that the end of my 20s proves to be as interesting, as fun-filled, as pleasantly dramatic, and as educational as the first half of my 20s have been. There were times where I literally thought that some situations would be the end of me, but it has turned out that they have only made me better. To those of you here to celebrate this with me, I appreciate you and love you from the bottom of my heart. Without you, there literally would be no me. You each mean something so special to me, and I’m extremely lucky and grateful to have you in my life.

I’ve come a long way from when I turned 20, and I hope that when I turn 30, I can look back at 25 and say the same.

 

Until next time, folks…

 

Take It From Here…

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I got inspired to sit and to write as I was sitting on my bed listening to Justin Timberlake’s “Take It From Here” off of his Justified album. I’ve loved this song since I was in high school, but I’ve been inclined to revisit it a lot as of late. I’m at a juncture in my life where a lot of important things are about to hit the ground running for me, and it can get to be a little overwhelming. 25 is very rapidly approaching, and it seems that it will be the year that I have the most growth — professionally, creatively, interpersonally, and any other aspect you can think of, I’ll probably be progressing as I enter into my mid-20′s. Here recently, I’ve been privileged enough to have a vast array of conversations with various people in my life. In these conversations, it’s been revealed that people think I’m a great person who deserves all of the love in the world, and who is full of talent and promise. Yes, I realize that that last sentence made it sound like I am tooting my own horn, but it is in fact not meant like that at all. I truly struggle with the idea that I’m great and capable of all of this progress that I see happening right before my eyes. It’s a constant battle to remind myself that I am a great person and that I am capable of great things, and it’s even more difficult when I don’t really hear it the way that I crave to hear it…

So where does the song come in?

Glad you asked! If you take the time to listen to the song, it’s basically Justin telling his woman that he’ll be there to pick up where she leaves off. He’s telling her that he’ll be her strength when she can’t do it anymore. That he’ll be the positive to her negative, the yin to her yang, “When all the love feels gone/and you can’t carry on/don’t worry girl/I’mma take it from here/Just as sure as the sun will shine/every morning every time/don’t worry girl/I’mma take it from here.” Powerful stuff, right? He’s basically telling her to lighten her load, take a breather, and just to lean on him, and he’s got it from there. There are some days I wake up tired, and don’t want to get out of the bed to do anything. I don’t want to write, I don’t want to use other creative ways to express myself, I don’t want to talk to people, and I definitely don’t want to go to work for 9 hours. It would mean something so special to me to get to have the kind of support that he’s talking about in this song. That unconditional, unwavering, and consistent support from a man who cares about and loves me.

Ah, one day.

 

Until next time, folks…

I Wanna Be She…

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Unlike a lot of people in my circle of friends, I got introduced to certain amazing music pretty late in the game. It wasn’t until last summer that I was introduced to the amazing, talented, and gifted Eric Roberson. And let me just say that the first time I heard his music, I was completely blown away. Now, I’m not ashamed to admit, it took me a while to buy his album Music Fan First. I don’t know what the hell took me so long to get it, but once I did, I was pleasantly surprised, taken aback, and almost immediately fell in love with the album. As on any album, there is typically one song that stands completely out to me, and becomes my favorite track on the disc. In this case, the song off of his album is “She.”

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aOiBNGCyv00]

This song is just…beautiful. I don’t think that there is another word that adequately describes the song. It’s simple, it’s poignant, it’s direct, and it spoke directly to my soul. I’ve known since the first time I heard it that it was a special song to me, but it wasn’t until I was driving home from Baltimore on Friday night that it really resonated with me why the song was so special to me. Mind you, I have listened to this song countless times, have listened and processed the words of the song, and have committed most of the song to memory, but it never really hit me why I was so in love with the song. It dawned on me that I want to be “she.” In every single line of the song, I long to be that woman to someone (who deserves it from me). For the first time in a very long time, I actually think I’m capable of being “she” to someone, which is taking some getting used to on my end. Once I came to that realization, I also noticed that it’s the simplest yet most powerful declaration of love I’ve heard laid over music in a very long time, and I can see myself in every note, melody, and rhythm of the song.

What does this mean to me at this very moment? It’s hard to tell…I know that I do desire something meaningful at this point in life. As I said above, I also recognize that I’m capable of providing support, love, and companionship to someone. I desire someone that likes me, wants to get to know me, and respects and cherishes me, but I know that that process takes time to get to and through. Am I in a particular rush? Not necessarily. I do think it would be nice, and every time I hear this song, I feel a little twinge of hope that it can happen for me some day.

I know I can’t be the only one out here who relates to a song on a deep emotional level. What song is it for you, and how does it make you feel? If this song spoke to you, what did it say? Leave me some thoughts in the comments.

Until next time, folks…

An Amazingly Simple Night…

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It’s been a while since I’ve put some words on this here e-crib of mine. Blame a full time job, a full time school load, and trying to maintain some semblance of a social life for that one. I decided to break my unintentional hiatus here with some thoughts that popped up this evening while on my drive home…

This evening I had the pleasure of finally meeting the boyfriend of one of my “big sisters.” Funny how I call her my big sister, but she needs a stepstool to hug me. ;-) Anyway…he and I clicked like we had known each other for years. I guess all of the trash talking we had done through her for the last couple of months built our rapport before we ever met each other. This isn’t about me, though. It is 100% all about them. What I witnessed tonight was one of the most beautiful displays of love I think I’ve seen in a very long time. It’s not because there were rose petals laid out all over the floor, or overt displays of affection (neither were present), but just because everything felt so…right. Anybody that knows me knows that I absolutely hate being a third wheel. Something about being single around a couple has always rubbed me the wrong way, but this time? Not even. They were so at ease with each other and with me that it felt like it was just three friends sitting around joking, laughing, and waiting to eat dinner, rather than a boyfriend, his woman, and her friend doing the same. The air in the house was just…light. No time for arguing, no time for ridiculousness, just genuine time spent with one another (and with me), and it was just absolutely perfect.

To be honest, it gave me hope. If I’m going to be honest with myself, I know I get really despondent about relationships sometimes, but watching them renewed my faith in a sense. It reminded me that true love doesn’t have to have this element of discontent and contention to it. I really feel like my friend and her man have the whole concept of “it’s the little things that matter” down pact. While I was engaging with them and cracking jokes the entire time, I was also taking mental notes. The way they talk to each other, the way they consider each other’s opinions, how hospitable each of them were to each other and to me, how you can literally feel the love they have for one another as soon as you walk into the room where both of them are…it left me feeling inspired. I needed to be reminded that it’s possible to feel that way about someone and to have them feel that way about you, and for it to just be…right. Man! I wish ya’ll could have been there…

Needless to say, I’m extremely happy for my friend. I’m so happy that he makes her happy and treats her well and that she walks around with a constant smile on her face because she deserves it. They fit each other well, they compliment each other well, and I feel like they work really well together. I’ve gotten a glimpse into what I hope my future looks like one day, and I am so extraordinarily blessed to have been in their presence for the short time that I was…thanks for the hope and the excellent example that you’ve set for me…

Between The Foreign Exchange being in heavy rotation, and having witnessed an amazing couple tonight, I feel like I’m going to have some great dreams. Everyone reading this – remember love is possible, necessary, and beautiful. Until next time, I leave you with one of my favorite lines from The Foreign Exchange that sums up exactly how I feel after tonight…

“Good people/good lovin’/good music in my life/
It makes me happy/so happy”
The Foreign Exchange – Happiness

An Ode to The Foreign Exchange

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If you’ve spent any amount of time with me within the last calendar year, you would know how much of a Foreign Exchange fan that I am. And I don’t mean a “oh yeah, their new CD comes out tomorrow, lemme go cop it” type of a fan. I’m the “let me pre order the CD, order the CDs I don’t have, and put everybody and their momma onto these things” type of fan. I mean, in the words of my good friend Cheekie, I STAN for these two. Let me give you a bit of a history on how I became such a Foreign Exchange fan…

Thanks to Twitter, I had started “meeting” people that I had never met before in real life. One of these people was an MC from my alma mater, DK aka Wayne Watts. He and I built up a rapport based on music, and when he released his “24” mixtape for his 24th birthday, there was one song in particular, titled “Birthday Party Guestlist (R.S.V.P.)” that caught me as soon as the beat dropped. Since he took the liberty of shouting me out at the end of the mixtape (that still touches my spirit btw), I decided to ask him where in the world he got the instrumental from for that song. He excitedly replied that it was from this group called The Foreign Exchange and the name of the song was Take Off The Blues. Ya’ll know I went to YouTube IMMEDIATELY and found the video for it. When I tell you my jaw hit the ground as I listened to the song…

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-a6OueWQ0O4]

That wasn’t the first time I had been introduced to FE. I remember a few years ago, hearing some tracks off of Connected, but I never thought to ask who the group was, or where I could find the music…but when I was re-introduced to them through DK, I. FELL. IN. LOVE. Never in my life had I experienced such a strong connection to music before…as someone who defines every event in her life through a soundtrack, it literally felt as if I had just discovered the soundtrack to my life. I can literally piece together songs off of all three albums to create my own personal soundtrack. From the chill flow of “Come Around” on Connected, to the introspective flow of “Daykeeper” on Leave It All Behind to the smooth groove of “Don’t Wait” on Authenticity, I have been able to musically describe my life and my thought processes for the last year thanks totally to The Foreign Exchange.

If for some unknown reason, you have NOT been blessed by the sheer talent of this amazing duo, please do yourself a favor and go download their catalog. You can get it in the iTunes store, or go to their website to getchu a piece of glory. From Nicolay’s amazing beats (like seriously, I have a heightened level of respect for anyone that can come up with music off the top of their head, but where does he GET the inspiration for this stuff? Listening to his instrumentals is like listening to magic be made, for real.) to Phonte’s verses so eloquently laid over top of said beats (and once again, this dude is the truth. He spits some real words about life and everything that comes with it in every single song on every one of their albums; I promise you, if you listen hard enough, you’ll be thinking about a lot by the time the album ends…), you can’t be disappointed in this group. You just can’t.

And let us not forget Darien Brockington, Zo!, and Yahzarah, all members of the Foreign Exchange family. Talk about people that can sing and compose music like none other…all of their features on FE albums, coupled with their own solo efforts…high quality music. I’ve put numerous people on to the entire FE family, and I literally get excited at the mere mention of new music from anyone in the group.

Everytime I listen to a Foreign Exchange piece, no matter what mood I’m in, a little piece of my soul smiles. From the bottom of my heart, to both Nicolay and Phonte, I thank you for making the music you make. You have no idea the positive impact that each of your CDs has had on my life. You literally speak to my soul and have helped me get through and process through many situations over the last 12 months. I’m SO looking forward to the next time you come to DC, because I will DEFINITELY be front and center!

Til next time, folks…